“According to new regulations instituted by the USDA, junk food is now totally verboten—in school vending machines, stores and lunchrooms.”
Well, good luck with that, USDA. It seems no one in that vast bureaucracy has ever had kids. If they did, they would immediately realize the futility of this gesture. If nothing else, this will create a thriving underground economy for young entrepreneurs who will smuggle in the banned substances and sell them to their desperate cohorts for price-gouging profits.
Capitalism will always win over statism, baby!