Ask The Examiner

Q: What’s for dinner tonight?

A. I’m thinking some nice grilled sea kitten with a side of cajun squirrel crisps.

Yum!

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Q: Who are the latest residents of Davey Jones’ locker?

A: That would be the 5 Somali pie-rats who held an oil tanker hostage for two months. When the $3 million ransom was finally paid by parachuting it to the pie-rats, they took off in their boat, which promptly capsized, drowning all.

Yeah, I’m crying, too.

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Q: What did the trial lawyers get from the new Democrat majority in Congress?

A. The mis-named Paycheck Fairness Act which rather than helping “working families” helps trial lawyers by opening up lots of new ways to sue employers—a “trial lawyers boondoggle” is how it was characterized by an opponent.

This bill might get some modification when it goes to the Senate, but the Democrats owe trial lawyers big-time and they expect something in return for their $$$$$.

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Q: We know Obama likes to use the “we only have one president at a time” when he wants to vote “present’, but how does the rest of the world view this claim?

A: If the good people of Jakarta are any indication, PEBO is right up there with the reviled George Bush, Olmert and Mubarak as this photo indicates. Obama with a ciggie hanging out of his mouth is a sweet touch—but remember, the world will LOVE us after January 20.

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Q: What is the latest in child discipline techniques?

A: The WWOD theory of behavior modification, also known as What Would Obama Do?

It seems a mother in Maryland has taken to exhorting her 12 year old son to “Be Like Barry” when he screws up.

No information was provided as to what she would do when she caught her son smoking cigarettes or marijuana or snorting a few lines, but I’m sure it will all be OK because it obviously didn’t do PEBO any harm.

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Q: What’s the deal with the lone dissenter in the Blago impeachment?

A: It seems that Chicago Rep. Patterson, who is an African-American still holds on to the quaint notion of “innocent until proven guilty”.

Weird, huh?