Hoot Of The Day
Hillary’s Day At The Fortune Teller
After Bill had spent several days campaigning for her and lost his temper many times costing her votes, and finally escaping from her overly controlling campaign manager for the evening, Hillary sneaked off to visit a fortune teller of some local repute.
In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news.
“There’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year just after you lose the election.”
Then the soothsayer looked up and locked eyes with Hillary, who was visibly shaken at this news.
Hillary stared back at the woman’s lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her shaking hands.
She took a few deep breaths to compose herself.
She simply had to know.
She looked back, deep into the fortune teller’s gaze, steadied her voice, and asked her the big question:
“Will I be acquitted?”
Too funny – thanks for the laugh!
Comment by Josh Curren | February 18, 2008
Dear Abby,
My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and, when I confront this, he denies everything.
Whats worse, everyone knows that he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also, since he lost his job 7-years ago, he hasn’t even looked for a new one.
All he does all day is smoke cigars, travel and hang around with his buddies – while I have to work to pay the bills. Since our daughter went away to college, he doesn’t even pretend to like me and hints that I may be a lesbian.
What should I do?
Signed – Clueless
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Dear Clueless,
Grow up and dump him. Good grief woman, you don’t need him anymore! You’re a US Senatorfor the State of New York and you are running for President.
Star acting like one!
Comment by Andrew | February 20, 2008